Lilly and the Night Of The skunk
I was in that sleep state where your brain is processing external noises - and
smells, but you're still slumbering. I was getting irritated because it seemed
that the dog had been pacing the deck, barking and howling for hours, and I also
knew that my bride had been in and out of bed a number of times. I opened my
eyes. It was time to put the dog in her kennel so that we could get some sleep….
and, what the hell was that nauseating smell?
I walked out of the bedroom and declared, "okay, it's kennel time". The dog and
Lori were now in the living room; our 100 lb. "puppy" was jumping around like a
Jack Russell Terrier - and Lori was smirking. "What is so humorous, it's
one-thirty in the morning", I asked my wife. The distinctive odor of a skunk
was now overpowering.
She told me that she had already tried the kennel
idea and it didn't work. Because Lilly had been so anxious and
barking, Lori leashed her and attempted to take her to the back yard
for a look around and a pit stop. As soon as the door to the back
yard was opened, Lilly bolted through the door and dragged Lori into
the kennel, barking and snarling at some unseen threat. That's when
Lori noticed the streak of white… Lilly had a skunk in her mouth and
was shaking it viciously; the skunk never had a chance.
I was instructed to look out the back window and
even in the dim light, I could pick out the skunk carcass lying very
Lilly (a.k.a Lilly LePew) was still pacing the room, growling
and letting us know she was not happy to be inside and the eau de skunk
was unbearable - and getting worse. In hindsight, it is hard to believe
that Lilly could hear or smell an animal on the other side of the house
stealing her dog food. But that little malodorous critter is what was
bothering Lilly for hours before she gained her new reputation as a slayer of skunks.
I figured that the only way to lessen the smell was to give the skunk a
Viking's funeral and burn the carcass, so I proceeded to build a fire in
the fire-pit we have in the back yard. It was now after two o'clock in
the morning and we were burning a body - after I shot it to make
sure it was not playing possum. It wasn't.
While the skunk baked, I used the garden hose
to wash down everything within range and Lori sponged down "killer dog" with
a solution of hydrogen peroxide, dishwashing liquid and baking soda. Thank
God the Internet was still open at this hour and Lori's search uncovered a
potion guaranteed to remove skunk smell from the dog.
As Paul Harvey says,
"now you'll learn the
rest of the story..."